Shorter Days and Heavier Worries

This winter season has brought shorter days and much heavier worry for so many of us. If you care for at least one neurodivergent adult, you carry hope and fear at the same time.

Cold weather keeps families indoors and routines tighten. The daily onslaught of news adds anxiety, outrage, and fear. You still show up each day. You manage appointments, paperwork, routines, and emotions. This work takes focus and endurance.

Many parents feel deep concern about the current attacks on social services, people who are already struggling, and what seems like endless traumatic new headlines. Cuts to staffing and program funding raise even more risks for those we love. Support networks feel thinner as energy is diverted to new social and political conflicts. Benefits feel less stable or may have already been cut and your worries about housing, health care, income, and safety for your loved one have only grown. All of your worries make sense. They grow from responsibility and love.

Avoiding these fears increases stress. So what can we do?

Action lowers anxiety more than constant monitoring, so here are a few small, concrete ways to manage your stress you can try today:

• Limit your news intake to set times and especially avoid it when you wake up and before bed.

• List your 5-10 biggest specific fears or risks so it's easier to just focus on those rather than EVERYTHING

• Separating facts from assumptions can also help focus your thoughts on what is factually true.

• Track which support systems are staying active (or funded) and consider testing out new ones.

• Build a short list of trusted professionals and peers you can talk with about your worries.

• Ask direct questions to caseworkers or other staff about program funding, eligibility, and important timelines. Prepare with intention rather than panic.

• Consider helping your neurodivergent loved one rethink their goals to reflect the anxiety we are all feeling right now. Many of us have had to scale back our goals to process what's happening around us. Focusing on skills, routines, and relationships that are within reach can help manage external stress and anxiety.

You also deserve space for rest and future planning. Your loved one benefits when you care for yourself. You can advocate for your loved ones and others in many ways, but you can't control program budgets or laws.

This season calls for endurance and focused advocacy for those you love, which you are a top notch expert in already. I have hope that we'll make it through this and maybe even come out it better than before. In the meantime, we're in this together. Sending love and hope your way.